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El Centro on five dollars a day
(Billy Bob Thornton/Randy Mitchell)
The lawman said, El Centro on five dollars a day? You must be dreaming, kid, how long did you want to stay? 'Cause, son, that's just the price of admission Are you out of your mind? 'Cause if you want to stay here you damn well better listen 'Cause you see, son, we got nine square miles of beautiful brown turf Zero murders per hundred thousand, and we could care less about the surf We're the centre of a promising commercial region We got the Rotary and Lion's Club and damn good American Legion I said, I'm just trying to get to the golden state I hear there's jobs everywhere and the weather is great And he said, Oh, I see you don't believe this is California Well, I guess the folks back in wherever didn't warn you 'Cause, you see, it ain't all swimming pools and movie stars If you're looking for that place, that may as well be Mars You little shit And then he said, Son, we've got points of interest and good museums and golf But if you really want your heart broke we're just a little bit soft If I had a nickel for every time I've seen your kind I'd be so rich I'd probably lose my mind And I said, Okay, I think I get what you're saying It's that you can't always get what you want without paying, okay You see, here's the problem, I never been much of a gambler But I, god damn sure, always been a rambler So I'm going to the place that may as well be Mars Unless you plan to keep me locked behind these cold steel bars He said, I've never been one to hold back a dreamer like you Maybe you'll get lucky as one of the chosen few And then he turned me loose, and he said, Here's your five bucks The bus station's right down the street, you saw it Now watch out for the toilet down there, I didn't say the place was perfect I mean, we got fungus just like everybody else does, you know Then I walked to the outskirts of town and I turned back And I said, Goodbye, El Centro, hello, California